Change | With an Open Heart

Apr 2

Important Message to With an Open Heart followers!!

Hello all 5,000+ of you! It has been A WHILE since I last wrote! I sincerely apologize to those of you who had become daily/weekly readers who were let down by this. I’ve been dropping the ball with not only the blog but Facebook, and Twitter as well.

But please hold out! With an Open Heart will be back and up and running soon! I’ve decided to move my blog to WordPress.org, which will change a few things for you, but not much. The plan is for it to be better than ever! The only problem is that the learning curve for customizing a blog on WordPress.org is WAY over my head! I’m trying, but with all of my other commitments, it’s taking a while.

I want to thank each and every one of you for your support, kind words, enthusiasm, and patience with the many ups-and-downs throughout the last year. I’m working to make With an Open Heart more than just a blog, and more of a vehicle to help people around the world improve their lives, so stay tuned! New beginnings are just around the corner!!

You can continue to follow through the wordpress reader, twitter, Facebook, google+, tumblr, or email.

Thanks again,

With Love,

Nina

Jun 25

The Yin and Yang of Life

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 22 and 23: The Yin and Yang of Life

“I wanted a perfect ending. Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity.”
-Gilda Radner

Life Lesson 22: There is Still Fortune in Misfortune…If You Open Your Eyes!

You’ve heard this metaphor before: You can’t control the storm, but you can learn to surf! That’s exactly what life is all about. It’s about enjoying the ride, -even the bumps. Take every obstacle in stride, and learn from every experience, -good or bad. You must remember, YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS TO FACE PAIN, OBSTACLES, FRUSTRATIONS, SADDNESS AND ANGER. Not a single one of us is immune to the ups-and-downs of life.

You might think that certain people have had made. That certain people have everything handed to them, or that they just lucky and don’t know the meaning of hard work or hardship. This may be true for a very small percentage of people walking this planet, but I know it is not for the majority. For most people, work was a very real part of their success. For most people, adversity, let downs, screw ups, and set backs, existed often on their life journey. There are more than a few people that even found themselves at a total loss and moving forward required completely starting over. It sucks, but life must go on, and so, it’s the only real option.

Karen Salmansohn, author of How to be Happy Dammit uses “The Fortune 500 Club” and “The Misfortune 500 Club” to help explain the Read more

Apr 8

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We Must Learn to Let Go of Judgment

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 15: We Must Learn to Let Go of Judgement.

“We should be lenient in our judgment, because often the mistakes of others would have been ours had we had the opportunity to make them.”

―Unknown

Part 1: Do Not Judge Others

Judgment: it’s a word that has a lot of weight behind it. The words that come with judgment are most often heavy, cold and unkind. There is nothing to gain when we judge. Nothing. If you know of something, please comment and let me know, because I can’t think of one thing.

When you judge others and others judge you, you put negative energy out into the world and in your heart. You’re also spreading a message that is likely not 100% truthful. Judgment is based on personal beliefs and schemas. Therefore, when you judge, you’re really showing many of your true colors. Sometimes, these colors are uuggglllyyyyy! These colors can easily out weight the beautiful colors underneath. We all know the saying, “Let your true colors shine!” But if your true colors are dark and sullen, then your “shine” will look much more like a dark cloud. I don’t know about you, but I’ll take a sunny day, over a raining day, ANY DAY! But hey, we can’t be a masterpiece all the time. We’re human. Not a single one of us is perfect.

Which brings me to my next point… Read more

Feb 25

In Order to See the Path to What You Want, You Must First See What is Hold You Back.

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 9: In Order to See the Path to What You Want, You Must First See What is Hold You Back.

“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” -C. JoyBell C.

You Gotta Move Forward, But First…

See what’s’ holding me back? What do you mean? I know EXACTLY what I want, and what path to take, but everyone else is getting in the way. I’m not the problem, everything and everyone else is!

Really? I’m sorry to break it to you, but I highly doubt that everyone else is the problem, and you have nothing to do with YOUR OWN PROBLEM. Yes, sometimes there’s some red tape in your way. And yes, sometimes, people in positions higher than you can deter your progress up the latter of growth (for instance in work situations). However, if you REALLY want to grow, and REALLY want to move forward, why are you still letting these people or things get in your way? Take a minute and really think about it. You can’t control how other people or things pan out, only how you do. If you want things to be different you have to change. Sometimes, that means quitting your job to pursue your passions. Sometimes that means taking the road less traveled. But you always have the choice to say, “No, I will not take this anymore, I want better for myself, and I know I deserve better, so SEE YOU LATER friend!”

When you get into the pattern of saying (and believing) that you are not the problem and your external circumstances are, you get into the pattern of allowing everything and everyone else to control you. When you believe that you have options, and you control your own destiny, that is when you break free from the perceived barriers that are holding you back.

We all have things within ourselves that are holding us back, -some of them small, some of them large. But the real problem is not that these things exist, it’s that most people aren’t self-aware enough to even know they exist. Read more

Feb 18

Stop Being What People Want You to Be, and Start Being Who You Really Are!

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 8: If you keep doing what you’ve always been doing, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always been getting.

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.” ~E.E. Cummings, 1955

Being Who You Are Can Be Hard

In this world of crazy competition and competiveness, it’s often difficult to ignore the pressure. It seems that even in early childhood we’re being pushed to “be better” to “do better” and to be “the best”. We’re graded from A-F, where F literally stands for “failure”. It’s a vast contradiction from the lesson that there are no such things as failures, just learning opportunities. We also have numerous tests to past, and major ones at that, such as the ACT and SAT, which can truly make or break a college experience. When we enter to workforce and “adult life” there’s so much focus on what job you have, where you work, what clothes you wear, what labels you have in your closet, what you know, etc. Social media allows us to share things in different ways as well, but no matter what, whether we like it or not, nowadays, we’re constantly in the public eye and therefore being judge. How difficult. What a lot of pressure that is!!

Sadly, with that pressure, you might start to pretend you’re Read more

Feb 4

With Fear Comes the Door to Freedom

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 6: With Fear Comes the Door to Freedom

“A man that flies from his fear may find that he has only taken a short cut to meet it.”

― J.R.R. Tolkien

The Only Thing Constant in Life is Change

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 5: The Only Thing Constant in Life is Change

“Some changes look negative on the surface, but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.”

–Eckhart Tolle

Change is Inevitable

It’s simply inevitable. Change is something that will happen no matter how hard we try to stop it. Change is a part of the world we live in. With every passing moment, things change. So why fight it?

Sometimes, the changes that take place in our lives are slow, and sometimes even anticipated. While other times, the changes are abrupt. Abrupt changes can throw us into a place of fear and uncertainty. This place may be a place of darkness. Even anticipated changes may make us feel fear or anxiety for what’s to come. Moreover, changes (even anticipated ones) don’t always produce an outcome that we favor. For instance, ending a relationship: even if you were the one that ended it, it doesn’t always feel great; you may still have a period of great sadness and maybe even depression. Or, lets say, losing your job: you needed that job; without it you can’t pay your bills, and so, clouds of darkness begin to shadow you’re life. Read more

Jan 7

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Out of Your Vulnerabilities Will Come Your Strength: Where there’s pain, there’s growth

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 2: Out of Your Vulnerabilities Will Come Your Strength: Where there’s pain, there’s growth

“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.”

― Andy Rooney

Pain Exists. Life can hurt. And sometimes, life can hurt A LOT. But this pain is for your benefit.

How many times have your heard it, “Life is not fair”. It’s true. Life is often unfair. We often get the shaft. Good people sometimes find themselves in bad situations, and painful experiences. While others, who you may believe live horrible lives always seem to get the “best possible scenario” in life. Don’t worry, karma has a way of working things out, sometimes you just have to be patient. Now don’t take that the wrong way, I’m not saying go ahead and resent people or wish bad things upon them. That’s wasted energy (and bad karma). Rather, don’t waste your energy, because the universe will take care of them. You have more important things to do with your life.

Let face it, sometimes, life is PAINFUL! Sometimes, it hurts so much, you feel as though you can’t go on. Perhaps you’ve even had a few nights where you’ve cried your eyes shut (I know I have). You may think, “Why? Why? WHHHYYYY???!!” Read more

Jan 6

4 Comments

30 Things To Stop Doing To Yourself to Improve Your Life

Last year I reblogged the article, 30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself . You may or may not have had the opportunity to read it, which is why I am posting it again. Even if you did read it, chances are it’s time for a refresher, and there’s no better time then the New Year. We’re all looking for inspiration, for change, for new beginnings; anything to help us keep up with our New Years resolutions! I hope you find it inspiring, helpful, and pushes you towards the direction of personal growth. Enjoy: )

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Photo by Rob Brucker

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Nothing could be closer to the truth. But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends. Read more

Jan 4

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The Story of the Lotus Flower

This post is part of The Awakened Heart Project

Week 1: The Story of the Lotus Flower

Given that The Awakened Heart Project is about helping you release your fears, to grow, to discover, to learn and to awaken, the story of the lotus flower and its symbolism seems like the perfect place to start this journey.

The lotus flower is a beautiful flower that can be found all over the world. But the start of this flowers life is not as beautiful is one might image. It’s unlike many other flowers. When the lotus first begins to sprout, it is under water, making its home in lakes and ponds in areas where the water remains fairly still on the surface. But underneath the surface, the lotus is surrounded by mud and muck and by fish, by insects, and simply dirty, rough conditions

Despite these conditions, Read more

Dec 13

6 Comments

Where There is Heart, There is Plenty…

Consider your actions of today or this week? Do you do the kinds of things that come from the heart? Many of us, do things for others, but only feel resentful afterwards. But what if we only did things from the heart? Or better yet, did the things for others we don’t want to but never feel resentful. Think about it for a moment. What if you stopped choosing resentment and simply did things because you felt it was right, and you wanted to? I’m not saying, stop doing things for others if you don’t want to (although that is your choice and I do believe in freewill), I’m saying, do these things, but instead of negative thoughts and feelings, feel joy, pleasure, and happiness. You likely made a Read more

Dec 4

Truths to Remember Daily

Sometimes these things get forgotten in our busy lives, but they’re important to remember each and every day. Take risks, know who you are and always have the courage to be just that, and don’t worry about what others say. Be true to yourself. Always.

My Authentic Experience in New York – The Beginning of the Rest of My Life [A Shared Story]

Authenticity is something I strive for everyday. I’ve become incredibly conscious of my thoughts, behaviors and my feelings in recent months, and I believe much of this is due my growing self-acceptance (perhaps not 100%. -I’m still working on it!), and allowing myself to “just be” rather than trying to be what others would find appealing. Making the transition to authenticity required me to be self-aware to a degree I had never practiced before. It has been hard work, but completely and totally worth it in the end. The lack of consciousness I carried with me previously, caused me to be driven more-often-than-not by my ego, which is completely based on external factors. The ego is a reflection of what others think; it is fallacious. Read more

Mar 21

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Changing Requires a Paradigm Shift. No one said it was going to be easy!

This morning I came across this post by A Thousand Shades of Gray discussing the paradigm shift we go through as humans whenever we’re in a process of personal transformation and growth.

Kurt Lewin developed the Change Theory that is today, the epitome of change models. Lewin is also regarded as the founder of Social Psychology and contributed vastly to the field. On the most basic level, Change Theory describes the process of change that occurs in humans, society, organizations, etc., as conscious and in three phases: Read more

Mar 20

6 Comments

What Are The Consequences of NOT Moving Toward The Unknown?

Even if we can’t physically see it, everything in this world is constantly changing one way or another. Everything. Some of us embrace change, and choose to move toward unfamiliar grounds, while others try desperately to hold onto familiarity, -to comfort. What is it that makes one person fearful of the unknown, and the other excited? Is it nurture? Is it biology? Although I have not sought out research on this topic, I’m willing to bet it’s a combination of both.

I recently reread a silly book I was given years ago by my cousin and came across an old fable on the topic: Read more

Mar 11

5 Comments

[FEATURED POST] You Are What You Think! Think Happy to BE Happy!

Each day, roughly 60,000 thoughts will cross your mind. What are you thinking about? Are your thoughts positive or are they negative? Do you feel happy most days or sad? Of these 60,000 thoughts, it’s up to you, to make sure that 59,999 of them are not wasted on negative, self-defeating thoughts.

We’ve all heard that you are what you eat, right? But what about You are what You think? Every thought you have creates a physiological response in the body. Read more